Things at Blackhawks games that most people don’t notice, but annoy the hell out of me!
So the Blackhawks won their first playoff game in overtime on Tuesday night, and I would love to write about it! But honestly how many blogs out there are doing that exact same thing right now??? Da Sports Guys is better than that, we want to open Chicago fans eyes to the things at Blackhawks games that annoy me, but go unnoticed by most people.
1.) Fans that sit behind the “Comcast Sports Desk”
Let me map this one out for ya! EVERYONE that stands behind this desk at any point during the game is a complete moron! Now I don’t know if people just want their 15 seconds of fame or just want to wave to their dopey friends at home, but these people rip each other apart just to be seen in their spiffy jerseys’. You get 5 kinds of morons that stand behind the desk: 1.) The Drunk Asshole 2.) The Asshole with an unfunny sign 3.) The old people who have never seen TV camera before 4.) The sexy chick 5.)Kids. A part of me wants that desk in a studio so damn bad, we know you’re at a Blackhawks game, you probably let everyone know about 100 times via social media before hand.
2.) B-List Celebrities
Jim Belushi, Danica Patrick, Vince Vaughn and whoever he brings to the game. They all have something in common, and no it’s not that the idiots that sit behind the Comcast sports desk are more famous than them. I want them all to stay away from the United Center. Tonight Danica Patrick graced us with her presence (cool guest if its 2006) provided little substance when interviewed then looked about as awkward as her driving when she had to “shoot the puck” after the 2nd intermission, yeah I thought she was a fox at one point, but that was in high school. I also thought Axe body spray, puka shells and T.I. were cool, but now all those things are for fucking losers just like Mrs. Patrick. Tell the Blackhawks PR squad that they can keep the “shoot the puck” contest and their b-listers.
3.) The Papa Johns Countdown Clock
Basically no one eats Papa Johns, it’s gross and no one is going to be screaming “Jesus we only have 8 minutes to order Pizza that taste like ketchup on a folder!!!!!!!!!!!!!”. With 8 minutes until the game I can go toast a waffle, at least that way I’d save money and it would taste more like a pizza.
It feels great to clear the air and get the little annoying things off my chest. Now that all the ranting is over with here is the second best thing to happen at the Blackhawks game! Susannah Collins telling it like it is:
How I would love to have success with her. Hawks WIN!
Noah Makes Sure You Know He Has Patrick Kane’s Back!
Hahaha freaking Jo! Just just basically putting PK haters on blast. I would love to see these two party together. But for the record Kane wasn’t in the club, he was passed out in a back yard. “Patrick Kane… Patrick Kane… And Patrick Kane!!”
BTW: Noah’s Coconut Water is absolutely delicious! Seriously cures Patrick Kane size hangovers.
Seriously, Can The Queen Care About Anything Less Than The Olympics?
Honestly, common lady, you own the UK, and you didn’t even have to invent the internet or start the Beetles to earn that right! At least pretend to act like you care about the biggest thing to happen in your country since the NFL started playing games there. God this chick is just insufferable, her and Jay should go bowling.
Patrick Kane Is So Cool That He Is ‘embarrassed’ By His Coolness.
SunTimes – Patrick Kane said Friday he was embarrassed by the photos that emerged after a party-filled weekend less than two weeks after the Blackhawks were eliminated from the Stanley Cup Playoffs.
The pictures—which appeared to show an intoxicated Kane in Madison, Wis., including one in which it appeared he was passed out at a bar—were published in an article on Deadspin.com and the Hawks star winger has kept out of the media since the story broke.
“It was embarrassing,” Kane said before participating in the opening ceremonies of the Blackhawks’ annual convention. “That’s the first thing I can say. From all the pictures that came out, everything, from the Hawks organization, to my family, to myself personally, it’s embarrassing. I try to pride myself on being involved with the fans and taking pictures when they’re asked for because I know I was a little kid one day that really looked up to stars like myself and try to give them that on behalf. But like I said, hopefully it’s something I can learn and mature from. It’s still part of my maturation process and something I’m still trying to get better at and the biggest thing, it was embarrassing.”
Here’s the deal: 1. This was the Summer of Gronk and Patrick Kane! 2. The time has come for Patrick to make things right with the Blackhawks. Because When Patrick says “ I try to pride myself on being involved with the fans and taking pictures when they’re asked for.” It means Patrick is going up to Mad-town, why? Because when Patrick isn’t scoring goals, Patrick is filling holes! (T-Shirts On Sale)
This is just good ole Kaner. Summer comes = Patrick has his annual “drinking problem”. Summer ends + PK is all business. And If you cant handle that maybe you should just grow up.
Embarrassed still?
UPDATE:
(CBS) Patrick Kane spoke to the media Friday for the first time since his early-May drinking escapade in Madison, Wis. and denied having a drinking problem.
The winger was the center of attention shortly after the Blackhawks season ended when
SEE! Point blank… Do you have a problem PK? Pfffttttt No way.
“NBA Will Place Advertising on Jerseys in 2013” Probably The Most Type David Stern Move Ever.
ESPN – The NBA is prepared to begin selling advertising space on jerseys. It’s over. American professional sports are officially corrupted by corporate interests.
If things go according to plan, the NBA’s adidas jerseys will have advertising on them for the 2013-14 season. This disappointing news puts a damper on the amazing NBA season that ended just more than a month ago at AmericanAirlines Arena, with the Heat capping their championship by dousing Erik Spoelstra with Gatorade.
This is such a David Stern move. Like I can just see him sitting in his big leather office chair, petting his cat and slowly plotting how to line his pockets while compromising the leagues integrity at the same time. How far are they going to take it? I want them to get crazy with it! Ads on center court, on the ball, backboard, league-wide mandated tattoos! Even the Nike logo shaved into Anthony Davis’s uni-brow! Completely reminiscent of Ricky Bobby’s windshield.
As A Sox Fan This Is A Pretty Flamming PR Move.
House Music night? Something tells me this isn’t the brain child of that old fart Reinsdorf , guy probably jams out to Cab Calloway on his record player. Seriously? Have you seen the crowd at a Sox game? Almost a quarter of the crowd is old Polish, Italian and Irish guys who literally wear black stockings. The rest of the make up is families or 40 somethings who scored free Sox tickets. I understand the Sox trying to be hip but this is kinda weird and gay. I’ll be waiting for Magic Mike to throw out the first pitch.
Here’s an idea Sox maybe cut back on the “Nights” it seems like the Sox have a “Night” every night. “Bring your 2nd cousin to the Park Night!” “African American Jewish Albino Heritage Night!” “Bring pictures of your colonoscopy to the Park Night!”. How about you just stick to Dollar Dog and and Winning nights. At least for now. Thanks.
Rose Thanks You.
Derrick is so adorable. It looks like the whole time his brother was just holding the camera, just telling Derrick “Listen D just say a few words to your fans, try not to look at me and then we can go home and you can play NCAA 13.”
Remembering Those Effected By The Colorado Shootings.
It is with deep sadness that our stupid little site writes about the national tragedy that took place in the early hours of July 20th, 2012. I want to make it my goal today to not shed light and or attention on the inhuman, piece of trash that is the gunman. Rather I would like to give the attention to the ones who need it the most, those effected by a man who just wanted to watch the world burn. Today My heart is with the victims. My mind is often overcome with the thought of when will humans evolve? When will the bloodshed in our very own Chicago streets stop? How many times must history repeat itself before society learns? Stricter gun laws? Why?
At this point I may be rambling, but as we all move forward into the weekend we all must remember to be kind to our neighbor, enjoy the little moments in this crazy life, because tomorrow you may never have a crazy little moment in this life. In closing as I head to the movie theaters this weekend to watch Batman myself, I know that keeping my focus on the movie and not on those who suffered will be an extremely difficult task.
Is This Michelle Jenneke As Hot As People Say?
This video is making its rounds on the interweb. Not since the days of Kate Upton’s Cat Daddy has there been so much buzz about a young girl, jumping around, pretending like she isn’t turning men’s clocks from six to midnight worldwide. But here’s the deal, It’s not turning my clock! Whats wrong here? Is she Hot? She looks like an average Tri-Delt siting in one of your college humanities classes. I really don’t get it, Ive watched this video like 4 times. She get an A+ for acting cute but a C- in my book for being hot. People need to know that there is a difference between cute girls and hot girls.
If I’m picking hot its Lauren Conrad next to Michelle.
The Bulls Are Trolling Us All! Radmanovic a Bull.
Yahoo- The Chicago Bulls have pulled their second free agent coup – yes, that’s right, coup – of the season by coming to terms with Vladimir Radmanovic, who will sign with the team sometime today.
A 12-year veteran, the 6-foot-10 forward played in 49 games for Atlanta last year, averaging 4.5 points and 2.9 rebounds a game. He’s exactly what the Bulls are looking for this offseason: A warm body – although that doesn’t seem to be an absolute requirement – who’ll sign a one-year deal for the league minimum, resume not required.
Yup, sure sounds like a basketball decision to me, right Gar? A lousy one.
The Bulls now have nine players under contract for the upcoming season: Derrick Rose (who’ll be out most of the season), Kirk Hinrich (who’s missed time the past two seasons with injuries), Luol Deng (who might miss part of the season), Rip Hamilton (who, based on last year’s showing, will miss most of the season), Carlos Boozer (a walking injury waiting to happen), Joakim Noah (an ankle turn away from missing significant time), Jimmy Butler, Marquis Teague and now Radmanovic (who missed time last season with back issues).
Nine players, seven of whom are either currently injured or are an injury risk. And we still have 3-4 more Radmanovic-type signings (i.e., league minimum) who’ll be expected to take up the slack left by the departure of The Bench Mob. They’ll be hacks, like Hinrich and Radmanovic, but let’s at least hope they’re healthy hacks.
Kirk Hinrich and Vladimir Radmanovic – it’s all very disappointing.
The Bears better freaking turn it up this year… I wish I had more to say but if this organization is gunna phone it in until Rose gets back, fans should do the same. Insulting.
Mizzou Wide Receiver is the SEC Funny Man.
Yard Barker Sports – The University of Missouri is entering their first season in the SEC. The SEC does not know Mizzou very well and Mizzou does not know the SEC very well either. Not yet at least.
On Tuesday at the SEC media day, Mizzou wide receiver T.J. Moe did his best to help introduce the SEC to Mizzou.
Moe, who is from O’fallon, Missouri, was named to the third team preseason All-SEC team last week, but is coming off a disappointing season that saw him catch just 54 balls for 649 yards and four touchdowns. Moe will look to regain the form of his sophomore season this year and as evidenced by some of the things he said at SEC media day, looks to be brimming with confidence as he enters his senior year.
Moe on the #SEC being better: “The girls are prettier, the air is fresher and the toilet paper is thicker.”
Well it looks like my school is finally getting some press and it just so happens to be from the person is suspected the least. Honestly I don’t know TJ Moe personally, maybe he is a regular Louis CK around his buddies, but based on the two occasions I attempted to interview this guy I received absolutely NOTHING!!! The guy had the personality of a door-knob. I’m honestly shocked, came across so introverted. He is the closest thing to a real life Toby Flenderson.
By the way thanks Coach Pinkel. Bang up job making an impression on media day as-well:
Yahoo Sports – “Joe Paterno’s a friend that I got to know professionally, and you can’t take away the greatness of this man,” Pinkel said. “He was a great man. However you analyze this, you can’t erase all that this guy’s done. You can’t do that. Nobody can do that.” Jesus Christ.
MIZ-SEC
Straight Outta Kompon!
(Chicago AP): The Chicago Blackhawks have hired Jamie Kompon as an assistant coach. Kompon spent the past six seasons as an assistant in Los Angeles, helping the Kings capture the Stanley Cup this year. He previously worked under Blackhawks coach Joel Quenneville in St. Louis, where he served as a video coach and then assistant over nine years.
In a statement, Quenneville says Kompon ”will bring us all the great qualities you look for in a coach.” The Blackhawks announced the hiring on Tuesday.
Hey Q, those qualities better be able to improve the Hawks special teams. Kompon’s Kings were ranked 17th in the power play department last year (Blackhawks were 26th). While I don’t expect earth shaking changes philosophically, rumor has it this is Just a Q cronie. Lets hope Stan isn’t simply giving Q rope to hang himself.
Who is Currently Less Shagworthy b/c of Their Past Douchebags?
Rihanna
Katie Holmes
Tale of the Tape
Rhianna
Low lights: Dated Chris Brown and Drake (Members of the Axis of Evil). Received a knuckle sandwich in the process.
Upside: Constantly plays for keeps. Wears bikini’s everywhere, does yoga in front of paparazzi’s and smoking J’s like its no big deal.
Katie Holmes
Low lights: Married Tom Cruise, gave birth to his child, lived at the Cruise compound for almost a decade and was into Scientology.
Upside: Escaped the Cruise compound and is now showing characteristics that of a human being again . Also returning to Catholicism (a big free agent pick up if you’re a Catholic.)
My take: Rhianna could have a fling with Joe Paterno and for some odd reason she would still be my guilty pleasure. I don’t know what it is, I hate Drake and CB so damn much but I always have to forgive Rhianna’s behind. Katie Holmes is cute but its no damn contest.
How do you guys feel? 1 being Kate Upton and 5 being 2012 Jessica Simpson, who is more untouchable on our scale?
Theo Epstein Has a Stalker That Looks Really Smelly.
(Trib) – A Massachusetts woman previously warned to stay away from Chicago Cubs president Theo Epstein flew to Chicago to stalk him and was arrested after trying to bring a birthday gift for the family’s young son to his Lakeview home, prosecutors said in court today.
Bond was set at $75,000 for Kathleen Kearney, 44, who was charged with two felony counts of stalking after her arrest at about 6 p.m. Monday in the 1400 block of West Addison Street, about two blocks from Epstein’s five-bedroom home.
Everyone has that one President of Baseball Operations they would like to stalk right? I’m sure Billy Beane would have to fight off stalkers with a fire hose if he looked anything like Brad Pitt. (He absolutely does not! Worst casting since Tupac in Notorious)
But the fact of the matter is this, some women find Theo simply irresistible, especially ones that make their clothes out of tablecloths. It’s just too bad Theo’s stalkers look like slugs, must be some sort of Cubs effect. Kenny Williams is probably pulling in stalkers that look like Bar Refaeli (White Sox effect) Men look better in white and black, its science.
This is Another Penn St. Article.
(CNN) – A small plane flew around the Penn State campus on Tuesday carrying a banner that read, “Take the Statue Down or We Will,” a reference to the statue of former head football coach Joe Paterno that sits outside Beaver Stadium.
The statue is among many vestiges left from Paterno’s 46 years as head coach of the Nittany Lions, a run that ended in disgrace in November when he was fired in the wake of a sex abuse scandal involving former assistant coach Jerry Sandusky.
“I’m a Penn State employee that thinks we have failed miserably, and I’m sad for the damage that has been done, but this is just upsetting,” Diane Farley, a PSU alumnus who spotted the plane on Tuesday told the Patriot-News of Harrisburg. “It’s just stirring up everything.”
So the last time we blogged at y’all JoPa was still alive and Sandusky was still a free man, fast forward to today JoPa is pushing up flowers and Sandusky is sharing showers (needless to say the world is a better place). But I don’t want to write about how awful a human Joe was, or how common sense isn’t so common on the PSU campus. I do however want to write about how fantastic the Diddler U scandal will play out on ESPN’s “30 for 30” down the road. Like I have a mental picture playing over and over in my mind: Joe Pa dies, PSU fans mourn, the general public is elated, the death penalty is thrown at PSU football, the campus goes into widespread rioting as a result, then the people who will “take down the Peterno statue” march towards happy valley in masses and the two groups meet! Fights everywhere! Dark Night Music in the back round at the fights climax:
The Army has to come in. Man I’m at the edge of my seat just thinking about the Film. I want your comments on what the film will be called. All I have so far is “HorseplayU”.
Chicago is Officially Out of Hot Sauce. (Kyle Korver traded)
(ESPN Chicago) – The Chicago Bulls’ trade of forward Kyle Korver to the Atlanta Hawks in exchange for a trade exception and cash considerations became official on Monday, the team announced.
Korver spent two seasons in Chicago after signing as a free agent from the Utah Jazz on July 13, 2010. The nine-year NBA veteran played in 147 games for the Bulls, averaging 8.2 points, 2.1 rebounds and 1.6 assists.
“It’s a bit of a bummer for sure,” Korver told ESPN 1000’s “Chicago’s GameNight” on Friday. “I love Chicago. I loved putting on a Bulls uniform. … What do you do? We learned this is a business and teams are going to make business decisions. I’m gonna go to Atlanta and try and go out there and play well.”
Well ladies thats a wrap… You can towel yourselves off now, Kyle has been shipped to ATL and one more piece of Bulls novelty is off the payroll. I can’t say his time in Chicago was a complete waste nor a complete steal. The guy’s tenure here was a lot like the team he played for… AVERAGE! Sorry Kyle you made for some cute catchphrases and a couple neat t-shirts, but you are not versatile and you are Atlanta’s one trick pony now.
P.S. I don’t want to hear about the game winner vs. Indy, every dog has its day. Feel free to share any other Korver memories here though.
Gathering Of The Juggalos Lineup Announced…. Concert Will Be In IL… I Would Never Go… But I Kind Of Want to Go.
(Huff Post Chicago)-“Harbored deep within the woods of Cave In Rock, Illinois, are living, breathing free thinkers [sic] who have constructed a compound of freshness for their kind to not only survive within but also to flourish.”
That “compound” consists of the Aug. 8-12 festival, which this year features, in addition to the Insane Clown Posse and a smattering of Psychopathic Records acts of course, Cheech and Chong, Raekwon, DMX, George Clinton and the Parliament Funkadelic, Master P, Biz Markie, Danny Brown, Three 6 Mafia, a reunion of The Geto Boys, Fear Factory, comedian Jamie Kennedy and the wrestler Ric Flair.
Here is my dilemma; I have never felt so morally conflicted while watching a YouTube video in my life! My life long stance on the Insane Clown Posse and their fandom is this: If there is another holocaust (god forbid) Juggalos HAAAAVEEE to be at the top of the list. All have to go, right up there with Baptist extremist, Sidney Crosby, pedophiles, hipsters, PSU fans and ventriloquists. I’m not saying I’m sitting here pulling for a mass extermination, but that’s just the way it’s gotta be, if we are playing hypothetical idiot cleansing BOOM it’s that pack.
Now that we have that out of the way, how freaking awesome does the Gathering Of The Juggalos Lineup sound?!?!? Seriously. Cheech & Chong, Raekwon, DMX, George Clinton and the Parliament Funkadelic, Master P, Biz Markie, Danny Brown, Three 6 Mafia, a reunion of The Ghetto Boys, Fear Factory, comedian Jamie Kennedy and the wrestler Ric Flair. Ric FREAKIN Flair!!!!!!! Wooooooo!!!! Stylin’ and profilin’ in front of thousands of painted up freaks! Women wrestling! All the recreational drug use you chose to partake in… Seriously if this was anything else I would pay big money! I don’t know maybe Juggalos are not so bad right? Maybe if you just went to a Wall Mart in Arkansas around 12:45 AM and painted everyone up like a douche-bag clown it would be the same kind of vibe at the gathering, who knows?
All I know is this lineup is the truth. I want to go, someone help me here. Gathering Of The Juggalos > Lolla!
P.S. People that attend Country Thunder and pass themselves off as REAL country fans are 10000000000 times worse than the worst Juggalo out there. #posers
Bears Ink Forte. RIP contract drama.
(Comcast Sportsnet Chicago) – “The Bears locked up their most productive asset and Matt Forte gained long-term security when the two sides agreed on a four-year deal just hours before the 3 p.m. deadline.
Now it’s official, Forte is the “franchise” running back in Chicago for years to come. The Bears traded for Brandon Marshall and drafted Alshon Jeffery to vault the passing offense several levels up and they signed running back Michael Bush, a starter last year for Oakland when starter Darren McFadden went down with injuries.”
So it turns out to be a pretty good day financially, not just for the all-pro running back but for yours-truly as well. That’s right I don’t have to buy a new Bears jersey for at least another 4 years!!! We are talking about 94 dollars that I wont have to shell out at Champs. I’m honestly just getting over the death of my Muhsin Muhammad jersey, just 5 short years ago (sky-point to #87). I don’t know if I would have been able to handle hanging up another one.
With that said here’s the deal… Forte agreed to a 4 year/$32 million dollar deal. Now even though I personally would have liked a franchise tag in the end, this is a happy medium. The team doesn’t have to dish out painful LeSean McCoy type money ($45 million with $20.765 million guaranteed) and in 4 years the Bears will have sucked all the youth and talent out of Matt (hopefully giving the bears a return on their investment.)
Lets all hold hands, be merry and view this as another brick in the road towards the Lombardi Trophy.
I just really like L.A. this year.
(HARDO)
How weird is this I mean we don’t blog forever and the first time back its an LA story. I just love this team right now, if you are a Chicago fan how can you not be on the Kings dick right now? They just sent Vagecouver, STL Blows and the Cryotes golfing, they have a former hawks coach/player in Darryl Sutter. Not to mention they sent Dwight Schrute Kings tix in Jello:
Last year it was Boston this year I’ve fallen for Kings.
P.S. To all 100 Phoenix fans who packed The Jobing.com Arena. Throwing a fit and your trash on the ice isn’t a good look bro. You have literally no respect from the rest of the NHL, you are bankrupt, your players get this sites “Frozen Douchebags of the Year” and you wont even have a team in about 2 or 3 years tops. Try and save what little dignity you have.
Jimmy Fallon With Another Brilliant Music Skit! Sexy and I Know It As Neil Young
Really starting to become a big Jimmy Fallon fan. Guy does a dead on Neil Young impression and even brings out Bruce Springsteen. LMAFO better be proud. This is a great performance.
Guys Here’s Your Chance, Apparently No One’s Asking Out Mila Kunis
(Yahoo) – “Mila Kunis is arguably one of the hottest actresses in the world, but that doesn’t mean guys are banging on her door asking for a date. After ending an eight-year relationship with Macauley Culkin in 2010, the “Friends With Benefits” star has been unattached — not that she’s complaining. “I honestly think being single’s great,” Kunis, 28, tells Harper’s Bazar in its April issue. But she’s quick to add, “Being in a relationship’s great [too]. It’s all about the timing.” But time is what she doesn’t seem to have. The actress just wrapped a six-month shoot in Detroit filming “Oz the Great and Powerful” with James Franco and Michelle Williams (Kunis plays Theodora, the Wicked Witch of the West), and the time away really affected her dating life. “I don’t get asked out,” she says. “This past year, I haven’t been home, so who’s going to ask me?”
Sign me up. Chick is absolutely gorgeous and talented and did I mention gorgeous? I’ll ask you out Mila, and I’m sure there will be plenty of guys in line behind me… ok well in front of me whatever.
Bears Release Hanie…Start Planning Scott Franzgrote’s Funeral Now
(ESPN Chicago) – “The Chicago Bears will not bring back Caleb Hanie to back up Jay Cutler, according to a source familiar with the situation.Bears head coach Lovie Smith admitted last month the club needs to formulate a better plan at the backup quarterback position heading into the 2012 regular season. Hanie, an unrestricted free agent, will be free to sign with any NFL team when free agency begins on March 13.”
Stevie Wonder could have predicted this one. Caleb Hanie was absolutely awful last season after Jay went down. The guy threw so many picks you almost wonder if he was colorblind. I hope one of the biggest Bears fans I know, and Caleb Hanie lover Scott Franzgrote isn’t taking this one to hard.
Da Sports Guys 