Made by Chicago Guys, For Chicago Guys.

Who is Currently Less Shagworthy b/c of Their Past Douchebags?


Rihanna

Katie Holmes

Tale of the Tape

Rhianna
Low lights: Dated Chris Brown and Drake (Members of the Axis of Evil). Received a knuckle sandwich in the process.
Upside: Constantly plays for keeps. Wears bikini’s everywhere, does yoga in front of paparazzi’s and smoking J’s like its no big deal.

Katie Holmes
Low lights: Married Tom Cruise, gave birth to his child, lived at the Cruise compound for almost a decade and was into Scientology.
Upside: Escaped the Cruise compound and is now showing characteristics that of a human being again . Also returning to Catholicism (a big free agent pick up if you’re a Catholic.)

My take: Rhianna could have a fling with Joe Paterno and for some odd reason she would still be my guilty pleasure. I don’t know what it is, I hate Drake and CB so damn much but I always have to forgive Rhianna’s behind. Katie Holmes is cute but its no damn contest.
How do you guys feel? 1 being Kate Upton and 5 being 2012 Jessica Simpson, who is more untouchable on our scale?

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